You’re right on. There is no “unconditional love” for anyone who has agency over their decisions. I unconditionally love my pets and my children and my feeble elders….not my lovers. The reverse is true as well. They don’t unconditionally love me, nor would I want them to. That would be unattractive.
Real love, verb love, will challenge us to be better people, not accommodate us in accepting flaws that hold us back. That resignation is decidedly unattractive, even when people claim outwardly to believe in “unconditional love” and then can’t figure out where their sex drive went and why they are spending half of their day eye fucking Paul or Susan in sales.